DIG (on USA!) thoughts: ep 10 (ten, rhymes with end...sorta)

Imagine me and you, I do;
I think about you day and night, it's only right...
So happy together!

Oh, Internet. It's 11 PM on Saturday night as I start typing this, and I don't know how to really express the depth of sadness I feel about what I am doing. What am I doing, you ask? I am writing The last DIG (on USA!) review. My last thoughts and reactions. There are no more episodes to watch now. Thursday evening, May 14, will be cold and lifeless. No Jason Isaacs tweets. Ori Pfeffer will not retweet me or give me too much information I expressly said not to. Nothing to scream at my TV about. No WTF is going ON?! moments. 

It has concluded. The mystery solved, the last twitching body laid to rest. 

It's okay. I'll be okay! Don't cry for me, Argentina! Or Israel. Or Croatia or Norway! I will be okay. (Because USA Network, until they say Yay or Nay definitively, will be receiving occasional, overly familiar, harassing tweets from me about green lighting a 2nd Season for DIG...and they can just go ahead and ask Jason Isaacs all about what it's like to get my occasional, overly familiar, harassing tweets. He knows all about these, because he gets them from me about every 3rd-4th time he tweets.)

Alright, diggers/digglers/diggees, let's just rip the band aid off. Let's talk about the last episode. 

Here's the mystery, solved (and if you haven't watched it yet, or even seen the series at all: (A) Why are you here? We are NOT friends...and (B) look away!! Look away now!!! I'm about to tell you THE WHOLE THING.):

In real life, Emma/Rebecca is a beautiful songwriter/singer/actress
named Alison, whose songs my daughter & I both love

*Emma was The Villain. The primary Antagonist. It was her, or rather, Rebbeca Donaldson aka Emma Wilson. THE WHOLE TIME. Someone mysteriously put the lost Donaldson murder/suicide investigation file Golan was trying to get from the grizzly old detective in the Negev Desert on Peter's desk and THAT'S how he figured out who Rebecca was (and thank you! whoever put that file there, because I spent about 3 hours last Thursday wondering: WHO THE HELL IS REBECCA???)

And she fell in love with Peter in the process of orchestrating the biggest antiquities/revenge heist of all time. She was in cahoots with greedy Margrove but not really--she just wanted to use him to avenge her father's death which Margrove caused by betraying his colleague, who just so happened to be Emma/Rebecca's dad. She lost her whole family because of Margrove's greed. And so, like a spider, she wove a web and trapped him, mated with him, and then ate him. And Margrove, who I was certain was a goner after, like, episode 3, ended up being the last of the dead guys, making it (almost) to the end. 

*The Order of Moriah? That was Ruth Riddell and Tad Billingham, and they got theirs. (Tad choked to death on some nuts...as he WENT nuts at the same time. No, seriously--he was eating nuts while talking nutty. Dearest, amazing DIG writers: I. LOVED. THIS. SO. MUCH.)

*Josh was a twin, and Fay was their mother. That means Fay killed one of her own children back in episode 1. 'Cause that's what crazy people do, y'all! Kill their kids. Google it--it's in the news all the time. 

*Josh turned out to be the very psycho Tad B. (who I THINK maybe was his dad?!?) was. (Parenting rule #1: model the behavior you want to see in your children.) And Josh turned on Tad, because Josh was taught that he's God's right hand boy/high priest, and so you know: he thinks he really is. Turns out, raising kids to believe they are God's gift to the world gives them an Entitlement Complex. (This is also called Extreme Spoiling, and I actually watched it happen, live, at my local supermarket about 2 weeks ago.)

So basically, evil Rabbi Lev and the Order of Moriah wanted to blow up Dome of the Rock. Rabbi Lev so he could rebuild the Temple and welcome the Messiah; Tad so he could start the Rapture and bring four horsemen down to scourge the Earth and bring the Messiah (and then Tad and Lev would get into a big fist fight about whether that was the First or Second Messiah). 

To do that, they brought in thousands of pounds of explosives disguised as books written by Tad Billingham. Then they rigged them all up to a dam that, when exploded, would flood the underground tunnels beneath Jerusalem and when the water made its way to the Temple Mount, BAM! Good-bye, Dome of the Rock; hello a lot of angry religious guys starting World War 3.

*Ruth's goin' to federal prison! Where she'll teach women to scare the shit out of people just by looking pointedly at them. (I think she should have gotten blown up in the damn dam, or had her throat slit by Lynn with the sharp letter opener, but that's just me. Because Armageddon Protocol.)

But now for the happy endings:

Blood. Red blood. Blood moons. Sacrificial blood.
Blood. 

*Lynn's still in Israel! She's running the FBI's Jerusalem bureau. Hopefully the rest of her time there doesn't involve any more blood. I think Anne Heche spent about half the show covered in blood, someone else's or her own. And no more climbing chain link fences, Lynn! You'll break your 5th metatarsal. And only sleep with employees who aren't being used as pawns in a chess game of revenge! But I do bow to your toughness, Lynn. You are a strong woman, and the next time I fight crime, I want YOU to be my partner.

*Peter made it! And he SAVED THE WORLD! And he's letting go of his past--he finally took off his wedding ring, and (I didn't see this but I BET) he deleted his ex-wife's phone number finally and he's going to see a plastic surgeon about that scar. He took Vicky's picture out of the drawer, and Lynn's going to send him far, far away (can it be to Atlanta, Georgia, Lynn? We have lots and lots of religious crazies for Peter to fight here, too). 

*Shem made it out alive! He's still out there somewhere, loving on Nature and saying prayers at strange moments while wearing white. He's counseling lost, fucked up people with gentle words of ancient wisdom. He's eating vegetables for dinner and dancing naked under the moon, and he's taking long, candlelit mikvehs. (I love the thought of a Shem out there in the world doing this, being a guardian of the Light for our spot in the Milky Way.)

*And Avram. Dear, sweet Avram. Thank God he made it off the DIG writers' pages alive; he's out there still. And so is Red (I'm going to talk about them in a few more paragraphs, because if I do it now, this will make me cry like I did when I rewatched it this afternoon and I need to get through the rest of what I want to say in my write up).

Basically, what I'm saying is: this show was, in the end, about water and a cow. 

....Did you know? Water has a very mystical meaning: it's used in purification rituals, to cleanse us. We are 50-65% water; without it we will die. And our planet will as well. Every bit of water we have on Earth today has been here since our planet was born; the water you bathe and shower in? Here since the dinosaurs. The water you wash your car with? Here before life began. All life began on Earth in water. Take care of it; it is precious. (Don't use it for nefarious purposes, either.)

I think it's really interesting that the DIG writers used water as a catalyst to either destroy or save in the end. (The dam's water was all diverted into an old archaeological bit of Jerusalem history: Warren's Shaft. Archaeologists who've studied it think it was first developed by the Canaanites; it is an ancient tunnel most likely used by ancient Jerusalemites as a water supply system. And it saved (in DIG) the world by diverting the exploded dam water away from the Temple Mount. Good job, ancient Canaanites!) In the beginning, I wrote about how I thought numbers mattered, that God was in the numbers. At the end, it turns out God was actually in the water.

And also I felt DIG was about darkness and light. Sons of Darkness, Sons of Light. An eternal, internal War of Soul. Maybe that's what Armageddon/Gog and Magog/the End of Days will boil down to: we'll all be fighting ourselves, inwardly...and only one of us will win. Let's all hope our Sons of Light come out on top. (Peter's did...he was tempted, at the end, by the Whore of Babylon, to come away with her and enjoy her spoils. Except Rebecca/Emma didn't realize she was dealing with a Son of Light. And so, in that way, Peter really was a Messiah. Of sorts.)

But mostly? DIG was about a cow. Not the cow herself so much, but Avram's devotion to her well-being--because DIG was about honor and loyalty and faith and loss and most important? Taking care of one another--Red saved Avram and Avram saved Red. Take care of each other, good people of Earth. Treat each other with kindness and care. Our animal friends, too.

And I think DIG was a good example of how to tell a good Hero's Journey story. Do you know about this? Joseph Campbell, an American mythologist, developed the concept--every story in every culture in every language in every corner of the planet even the farthest removed tells mythologies, and they all center around a Hero who must embark upon a Journey. One day, he wakes up and realizes: I have to go on a journey. Sometimes the journey is to rescue a maiden, or slay a dragon, or defeat a giant; it varies depending on the story and the culture. And so the Hero sets out--he leaves everything he knows behind and takes a journey. Along the way, he meets friends who are enemies, enemies who are friends, he has to overcome obstacles, pass tests, he fights battles and is wounded...until finally he reaches a Dark Night of the Soul, in which he must make the decision to either give up and die, or go on. But choosing to go on means the Hero must change, and change will involve doing the hardest thing(s) he can ever possibly imagine doing. But if the Hero does it, in the end he wins and goes back to his village to accolades and adoration. But if the Hero does it, he is changed forever, and Life as he knows it will never be the same again. (Not necessarily a bad thing.)

I think Campbell's The Hero's Journey could be applied to Lynn, Peter, and Avram. They all were woken up one day, realized they had to go on a journey to fight something terrible, and met enemies who were friends and friends who were enemies and suffered through Dark Nights of the Soul along the way. 

Particularly Avram: in the end, he is forever changed; I'm not sure if he lost his faith or just his faith in the people of his faith. But he has left the Orthodox community for the world because of Rabbi Lev's evil, and he will be forever changed now. 

Red is free. Home on the range. The last moments we see of her are a sweet, happy calf surrounded by her "people," running off to enjoy the world...no sacrificial knives or weird kids in breastplates anywhere. And the real Red is also free, along with all the other baby cows who worked the show with her. They are all free, running around in the world right now, and will never ever be a source of food for anyone reading this. They are safe, safe at last.

Since Golan got killed (sob!!) Shem and Peter could save
the world in DIG 2. (Shem will use prayer to catch bad guys, and
Peter will make sarcastic asides.)

Three Stars and a Wish

A wish:

That the final episode had been longer. I realize Jason, Ori, Anne, Alison, etc. would have had to stay in Croatia like 1-2 more weeks eating pizza while missing their loved ones and USA would've had to cough up more cash, but I felt like there needed to be about 30 more minutes, maybe 40; this show felt slightly rushed to wrap it up. A big show to start the story; one big one to finish it. And I wish the Armageddon Protocol stuff had been a bit bigger in scope and nature. More water, more explosions. I mean, Tad and friends were trying to start The End.

3 Stars:

1. Clearly, I am in love with the writers (still! we are STILL on our perpetual honeymoon, DIG writers! Til death do us part). So I thought the writing was superb and stunning, stunningly superb. Throughout. There were a lot of moments I watched and re-watched and went: holy crap, those are amazing storytellers. How does one learn to do that? I would like to just sit and pretend to darn their socks while they work on their stories. So I can learn from them.

2. The final episode had some amazingly awesome writing in it, and words that sat with me most from this episode were from Peter:

"Maybe it should all end. Let everybody wipe each other out in the name of God." (JUST last Friday, I thought the SAME thing, Peter Connelly!)

and what an awesome exit line: when Emma/Rebecca tells Peter she'll see him in Hell, he says, "Not if I see you first." (Oh my god. I am SO using this in the next argument I'm in that person tells me to go to Hell.)

3.There were some loose ends. But this is actually a positive for me, and here's why: I have read things on the Internet from people complaining about these loose ends. There are questions about why certain things happened or didn't happen, or what was the point of that character. Just some things I've seen around town: what was Ridell's motivation? What was Billingham's? How'd the file get put on Peter's desk/who put it there? How'd the Essene know where to go? How'd the bombs get there? How'd Emma/Rebecca even know about Peter? How'd she find out so much about his daughter? 

These questions are why I think the finale needed to be longer...and yet, I'm okay with not having ALL the loose questions answered. You out there reading this may not be, and the questions have been really chapping your buns (my suggestion: stop reading imdb.com's message boards; lunacy lies within). But I am okay with loose ends. And I'm okay with the unanswered questions because I think that's just how Life works--sometimes there's an ending and you can't figure out why somebody did that thing, or didn't do that other thing they were supposed to do. Sometimes you don't get to say good-bye; sometimes there isn't any closure; sometimes you just aren't supposed to know.

I'm also okay with lingering questions about some of the characters because I know about building characters--when I write stories, every single character I put in it has a background and a motivation; I know what these are. Every detail, every motivation doesn't always make it into the story; but I don't build them into my characters for that reason. I build them into my characters to give a story movement and life. Sometimes it's to make a character more real, or to make another character more real. I am totally fine if that's what the DIG writers were doing with this. 

But this freaks some people out--I once took a writing class with a lady who got really annoyed with me because I wouldn't write a complete ending to any of my stories. And I hated reading her stories because they were always ended on such pretty, wrapped up, here-you-go presentations. C'est la vie; to each his own. 

All in all, I hearted DIG tremendously. Its creators, Gideon Raff and Tim Kring, wrote it on spec and I'm not sure necessarily wrote it with the intention it would go on and on. From what I understand, they simply wanted to tell a whole story, for us to watch on our TVs (or iPads or wherever you watch your TV shows now). But the writing was so tremendous, and the acting was so stellar, and it is just human nature to want stellar, tremendous things we are enjoying to continue. Orgasms SHOULD last days and weeks, it is not fair they only last a few seconds. So I think there should be a Season 2, so we can all meet back online and orgasm together, with a new adventure. But if there is NOT a Season 2, then I am happy this story is out there in the ethos now. When my child is old enough, I will share it with her. And she can share it with her child(ren) and so on and so forth, as is the connective nature of storytelling.

It was a wild, roller coaster ride every Thursday night, thank you, DIG writers and cast and crew! But man. I will confess: I have an extremely addictive personality, and so I'm going to have to go to DIG rehab now. But first, you know what I'm going to do this Thursday night? Start over with Episode 1. I have them all in my DVR, and I'm going to start over with Episode 1 this Thursday, and recreate the whole thing!

Also, I'm going to harass Jason Isaacs on Twitter to see if he'll wake up at 3 AM on Thursday (aka Friday for him) in London for the next 10 weeks to re-live tweet them again, for me, personally. 

What is Peter looking at???

(scroll down to solve the mystery)

It's Debbie! Come to avenge Golan!!

And it's Golan! It's his ghost! (Shem brought them both back via prayer)

(Yes, yes. I KNOW THEY'RE DEAD FOREVER.
But I'm a magical thinker. Stop judging me.)

temple mount--DON'T TOUCH IT.

Oh my god, Internet. Tonight is the conclusion of DIG (on USA!). Remember when it started, back on March 5? We were young, we were in love! The world was our oyster, we had it all! All the possibilities! And now we have to say good-bye; parting is such sweet sorrow. (My Nostalgia Issues are in full effect. Wait until I do my Dig #10 write up!)

Also, because I haven't said it here on this blog yet: I am so thankful to Jason Isaacs for (a) putting up with me on Twitter and (b) retweeting and putting out the link to this blog on his Twitter page. First off, what he said about my geeky researcher issue was so NICE (Jason Isaacs is so NICE, Internet--you be nice to him!), that I have a feeling Jason may be a bit of a geeky researcher himself. Maybe? Second off, now not just my mom and 10 friends have visited this blog, and that's nice too. I don't know if he'll see this, but if he does: Thank you, Jason! That was so nice of you, I will forgive you for 1,000 things for the next 50 years, including but not limited to pillaging entire towns. (If your town gets pillaged and you complain about it, first I will ask you: Was it Jason Isaacs? And if you say "Yes! Jason Isaacs pillaged my town!" I will tell you to stop complaining--clearly your town needed pillaging and also THAT WAS JASON ISAACS.)

Okay. Onward! Here's your quick (heh, not really) & dirty on the Most Controversial Rock on the Planet:

Temple Mount--in Hebrew, known as Har HaBayit or Har HaMoriya. In Arabic known as Haram Al-Sharif, the Noble Sanctuary. Trapezoid in shape. Located in southeastern, Old City Jerusalem. Four religions have controlled and used it for thousands and thousands of years: Judaism, Islam, the Roman religion, and Christianity. Currently, it is occupied by four buildings from the Islamic Umayyad period: al-Aqsa Mosque, the Dome of the Rock (the gold structure you see featured prominently in DIG), the Dome of the Chainm and walls from King Herod's reign. The Temple Mount is also associated with Mount Zion (Har Tsiyyon), which is a hill just outside the walls of Old City Jerusalem, and is sometimes used in reference to the entire land of Israel.

There have been 2 Temples--the first Temple was built by King Solomon, second son of David and Bathsheba, second King of the United Kingdoms of Israel and Judah. It was completed about 957 BCE. There is no archaeological evidence for the existence of a 1st Temple except for Biblical and rabbinical sources, as well as the Roman-Jewish historian Josephus' writings. Some scholars believe a Jebusite sanctuary stood there before Solomon built the Temple (the Jebusites were also known as the Canaanites--remember Dinah and Jacob?). In fact, the earliest known inhabitants of the area we now call Jerusalem were from the early Bronze Age period, about 3,000 BCE. Archaeological excavations have shown evidence of a town on the south side of Mount Moriah (also known as the Temple Mount). The name of this town was Urusalim, which means "foundation of Shalem," or "foundation of God."

Around 1,000 BCE, David conquered Urusalim, founded the joint kingdoms of Israel and Judah, and Urusalim became the capital. The Ark of the Covenant, traveling around with the Israelites wherever they went, was moved into Urusalim, around 955 BCE. The Ark is basically a portable shrine, inside it being the Ten Commandments given to Moses, and also--essentially--God's holy digs. (God was housed in the Ark, is what I'm saying.)

Mt. Moriah was already holy when Solomon decided to build his temple there, for a couple of reasons:

1. This is where Abraham almost sacrificed Isaac.
but
2. Before THAT, this is the spot the serpent Tahum held the bare rock in its mouth. In the Book of Proverbs, Chapter 30, there is a prophecy about "the serpent of the rock." It is also brought up in the Book of Revelations, in Chapters 13 and 18.

It is, therefore, an Axis Mundi, which is a portal, an intersection of sorts, between the underworld and and the upper world. This is where ley lines come in--ley lines are alignments of geographic and historic significance and interest, such as ancient monuments (or, you know, Temples), natural ridges and rocks (the Grand Canyon, for instance), waterways and the like. We've been using the term since about 1921 when an amateur archaeologist named Alfred Watkins coined it. The geographic and historic areas of interest are considered mystical, and Alfred believed there was a whole system of them in Britain, actually (Stonehenge, anyone?). But basically, you can connect a line from one mystical place of significance to another, and essentially, the lines all lead to the same place (i.e., each other...there is no way to get lost, in other words. If you follow the ley lines...they're like magic Yellow Brick Roads).

They're connected to Axis Mundi in that an Axis Mundi is basically: the center of the world. It's the connection between Heaven and Earth. A magical, mystical pole, if you will. Or maybe an umbilical cord. It can be natural (a tree, a mountain, a vine), or man-made (a staircase, a totem pole, a church steeple). It can be secular in nature (a lighthouse, a rocket, a skyscraper), or religious (a temple, a mosque, a church).

Every inhabited spot on our planet has an Axis Mundi, supposedly, a place that is sacred above all. (I bet America's is Walt Disney World.) The main thing about an Axis Mundi is that it is ordered; it is settled, it is calm, it is peace. Everything that expands out from it (North, South, East, West) is mass chaos. But when you are in the Axis Mundi? Soooo chill, brother (and sister).

So the Temple Mount--it's supposedly an Axis Mundi. A spot you can speak to God. A place you can Know All and Be At Peace. And because it is SO very ancient, and SO full of mysticism, the Temple Mount is considered the PREMIERE Axis Mundi of the world; our planet's belly button. The spot all the ley lines from everywhere else lead to. Making us all one big, happy family. (HA! Just kidding...read on.)

When Jacob came to the spot, he took a stone from the spot his father Isaac had almost been sacrificed by his grandfather Abraham and he slept on that stone, using it as a pillow. While he slept, Jacob had a prophetic dream so amazing that when he woke up, he anointed the stone with holy oil he'd received from Heaven itself. And when he did that, the stone sunk deep into the earth, becoming the foundation stone upon which Solomon would build the first Temple. The spot was known as "Bethel," meaning Gate or House of Heaven.

The second Temple, begun by Ezra and Nehemiah about 353 BCE, was completed around 349 BCE. The four walls surrounding the current area date back to the 2nd Temple Period (around end of 1st century, BCE).

The four walls around today's current Temple Mount are partly built underground, and they were built around the top of Mt. Moriah, the spot where Abraham supposedly went to sacrifice son Isaac upon receiving instructions from God to do so. The original (as in: Solomon's) 1st Temple was supposedly constructed here, on Mt. Moriah, to be a permanent resting spot for the Ark of the Covenant (the box that contained the Ten Commandments God gave Moses). According the Bible, the 1st Temple had a ceiling that was about 180 ft long, 90 ft wide, and 50 ft high. Its highest point was supposedly 20 stories (207 ft) high.

Solomon spared no expense when building the first Temple: he ordered massive amounts of cedarwood from King Hiram of Tyre, chose HUGE blocks of only the best stone. To build the Temple, King Solomon drafted workers into forced labor, making them work shifts that sometimes lasted months. 3,300 officials oversaw the 1st Temple's construction. Building the 1st Temple put Solomon into so much debt, he handed over 20 towns in Galilee to King Hiram to pay it off. When completed, King Solomon inaugurated the Temple with sacrifices and prayer. He even invited non-Jews to come worship there; Solomon wanted all the people of the Earth to know, hear, and worship God's name.

The most important room in Temple #1 was the most glorious and elaborate, and it contained not a single bit of furniture. It was called The Holiest of Holies (Kodhesh Kadashim), and this is where the Ark of the Covenant and the Ten Commandments lay. This, essentially, was where God dwelled.

Four hundred years later, Nebudchanezzar II of Assyria and the Babylonians destroyed this Temple (around 586 BCE), and the Ark (and its Tablets) disappeared to antiquity.

When the 2nd Temple was built, God's special area was reduced to a small, plain, bare room. The High Priest would enter the room only once a year, on Yom Kippur, to pray on behalf of the Israelite nation (breastplate, 12 stones). 

When Cyrus the Great of Persia took control of the area, all the exiled Israelites were allowed back into Jerusalem, thus making a 2nd Temple construction possible. They began construction at the site of Solomon's original Temple, which had lain in a devastated heap of rubble for over 70 years. It was finally completed and dedicated under King Darius of Persia's reign. King Herod finished it all off in 20-18 BCE, with the walls and he even smoothed off the surface of the Temple Mount and replaced all the foundation stones; for that, the Temple became known as Herod's Temple. There were four courts in Herod's Temple #2: the Court of the Priests (where they did the sacrifices), Court of Israel (men only), the Court of the Women, and the Court of the Gentiles (for non-Jews). Each edge of the Temple had a columned and covered area called a portico; Solomon's Portico was on the eastern side, and probably where Mary and Joseph found 12 year old Jesus who had disappeared to talk religion with the priests.

Eventually, the Romans conquered Israel and when they did, they lay waste to both Jerusalem and the Temple Mount, about 70 CE, under Emperor Titus. Not only did they build a temple to Jupiter on this spot, they also destroyed it as a calculated act; its destruction was meant to disenfranchise Jews, to disconnect them from their holy city, their holy relics, and their holiest sanctuary of worship. The Romans renamed Israel "Palestinia," a further effort to disconnect Jews from Israel. The only thing left from the Temple that was destroyed by the Romans is the Western Wall (also known as the Kotel, or the Wailing Wall).

When Roman emperor Constantine adopted Christianity as its religion around the 4th BCE, his mother St. Helena, supposedly built a small church on the Temple Mount, but really they focused their efforts on constructing the Church of the Holy Sepulchre nearby, which is now one of Christendom's holiest sites. Herod's Temple? It just remained a giant garbage dump site. For many many years. In fact, with each destruction of the Temple Mount, many holy relics and artifacts were lost to antiquity.

...and, supposedly, the ashes of a pure, unblemished red heifer. So now we have to start all over if a Temple #3 is to be built.

But building a Temple #3 would be baaaad news, World Wide Web. Because currently standing on (supposedly) the place where Solomon built Temple #1 is the beautiful gold domed Dome of the Rock, Qubbat As-Sakhrah, in Arabic). It was built towards the end of the 7th CE, somewhere between 681-691.  It was built Abd al-Malik, from the Umayyad Caliph period (a caliph is a civil/religious leader who succeeded Mohammad, and they lead the entire Islamic community). A mosque is nearby the Dome of the Rock--al Aqsa Mosque (meaning "the farthest mosque") and it is silver-domed.

Some mistakenly believe the Dome of the Rock itself is a mosque; it is not. It is merely a shrine, built on top of a foundation stone, the spot Muslims believe Mohammad took his famous Night Journey on a horse named Buraq, in one single trip in the year 621 CE. This was a physical and a spiritual journey (it's called Isra and Mi'raj) for Mohammad, and Muslims believe he ascended into Heaven to speak to God and be given details about how to pray, and he ascended into Heaven from the spot the foundation stone the Dome is built on.

Source: biblewalks.com

Around 1099, during the Crusades, Christians took over the Dome of the Rock. They called it "Templum Domini," and turned it into a church, constructing a cross on the dome. Al-Aqsa Mosque became the headquarters of the Knights Templar, called Templum Salomonis (Temple of Solomon.) The Christians were eventually driven out by Saladin and Dome of the Rock was given back to the Muslims.

Today, the Dome of the Rock is under the control of an Islamic foundation called the Waqf, and the Waqf's activities inside the Dome are monitored by the Israeli Antiquities Authority.

When you visit the Temple Mount today, you'll see the big gold dome, but also a huge plaza full of minarets, fountains, pavilions, date palms and cypress trees. There are 8 stairways that lead to the platform of the Dome of the Rock, and each has a set of arches where Islamic tradition says that the Last Judgement will use to hang scales on to weigh souls. There is also an Islamic Museum in the Southwest corner that displays ceramics and other archaeological artifacts removed during the restoration of the Dome.

There are also several blocked gateways that had stairs or ramps leading into or out of the city. The eastern wall is where The Golden Gate supposedly was; it's the spot Jews think the Messiah will enter Jerusalem. And then there's the Western Wall (the Kotel) where people pray and leave written prayers in the wall.

The big controversy around Dome of the Rock right now (and why it's a ticking time bomb, essentially) is who it belongs to. And who gets to use it; who has access to it. Right now, non-Muslims are allowed in through the Moors' Gate, located near the Western Wall. The hours of visitation are restricted, and no one is allowed in during Muslim prayer times, or when there is tension between Arabs and Jews. And modest dress is required. The Israeli police and government support these rules.

If you aren't Muslim, you won't be allowed to actually go into the Dome of the Rock or Al-Aqsa Mosque. And non-Muslim prayer on the Temple Mount is a big, big NO (no).

However, the Chief Rabbinite of Israel has placed a warning for Jews that they aren't to go in there anyway--it's too holy. I mean, hello! You might step on the LORD accidentally.

In addition to all of THAT, who knows what lies beneath the Dome...thousands and thousands of years' worth of antiquities. And DON'T TOUCH IT. (There was controversy a couple of years ago when the people running the Dome of the Rock put in new carpet, and the Antiquities Authority wasn't notified--apparently, the ancient floor was exposed and some geeky people really wanted to see it and document it. But now it's got new modern materials on it, so. Crap.) (This sounds JUST like an episode of HGTV, where they pull up flooring and find beautiful parquet floors underneath and go: Why'd they cover THIS up?? People have NO taste.) (And also, it sounds like my Home Owner's Association, every time I want to plant flowers in my front yard: DON'T TOUCH IT.)

I could probably go on and on for about 200 more pages--I could spend gobs and gobs of time talking about the anger and resentment over how very conservative and religious Jews feel Muslims need to get the heck off their property, and how very conservative and religious Muslims feel Jews need to get the heck over themselves.

But I'm not going to do that, because that's going on right now, in some corner of the Internet and if you want to get involved in that kind of discussion and stress your spleen and guts out, you go right ahead. I've got enough stuff on my own Life Plate and my spleen and guts will burst if I have to have one more stress on it. So go ye forth, seek and ye shall find. But please don't do it here, because quite frankly when it comes to religion I've about had it. I'm spiritual; I believe in a Something...and I love you guys, and I know this is what keeps you going 7 days a week, and so I want you to do that which brings you comfort and peace. But please also know some of you get so intense about it you weird me out and give me the sads. The world simply doesn't have to be like this. And we don't need to be fighting over a rock, I'm sorry if you disagree with me, but there it is: stop fighting over a rock, Major World Religions. If I were allowed into the Dome of the Rock and could find the spot the serpent had in its mouth, I would step into that Axis Mundi and have a long talk with Heaven. And I bet Heaven would agree with me: Yes, Amy, those guys ARE ridiculous, and Yes, Amy, you SHOULD be in charge.

And THEN we could have World War 3, world. Because DIG (on USA!) ends TONIGHT and I'm going to need to have something to keep myself occupied.

dig (on usa!) #9: i can't even.

Oh, Golan. I will miss your hot headed self and
sarcastic detective asides. 

Y'all. I can't even. I mean, I've slept on it for three days. And I'm still...I'm still...I can't even.

Well, let's just deal with it. Because I've done talk therapy, I know the best thing to do with emotions that are overwhelming you is to just face them head on and deal with them. Talk about them. So let's do that first, Internet:

1-ONE EPISODE IS LEFT. You guys! There is only ONE EPISODE LEFT. What the hell am I going to DO with myself?? What will I look forward to on Thursday nights at 10 PM U.S. Eastern Standard Time? What will I over analyze? What excuses will I have to ask Jason Isaacs weird questions on Twitter? More than all of that: WHAT WILL I RESEARCH??!! I really have to stop and take deep breaths when I think about all of this.

FYI/side note: I did put a demand out in the Universe/Twittersphere, to let them know there MUST be a Season 2 for DIG. Universal Cable Products favorited it, and that felt like God saying, "Yes, my child." But I also know (from personal experience) how God can be--sometimes God just likes to fuck with people. (I submit the entire book of Job from the Bible as evidence.) 

2-Golan's death. I'll be honest with you: I'm still not okay. I AM NOT OKAY. Listen: I had a whole thing cooked up for the DIG writers, about how Peter and Golan could go to Russia next and fight Putin. Because I think someone like Putin just needs to be taken down by a gay person. It was such a perfect plan--Peter was going to be the emotionally wrecked wing man in DIG Season 2 who gets beat up and smacked around, and Golan was going to be the hothead who saves the world (sorry, Jason). And then I was going to ask Jason and Ori where they'd like to go for Season 3, and I was going to have Anne Heche beat up all the bad guys and save the world, and Jason and Ori were going to do paperwork and get beat up by the bad guys now and then. But in a location they both really wanted to be in, because I'm just really thoughtful about things like that.

But no. NO!! The DIG writers did it again. They killed a darling. With another cut to the throat, but this time far crueler and gorier. That cut was right through the trachea, I'm told. As opposed to Debbie's slit throat, which was sacrificial in nature, a cruel-but-kind gentle death almost. Golan had to, like, literally drown in his own blood, knowing who did it and what was happening. Horrific. And my particular brain can't handle gore or thinking of people having to KNOW they're dying slowly but surely in graphic ways, especially when this is done to characters I've become emotionally invested in, who I've grown to love a lot. (What I'm saying is: this is going to stay with me awhile.)

Also I tweeted this to Ori Pfeffer, and I actually meant it: he's a big talent, and I think he deserves an Emmy for that death scene alone. I wish someone would put me in charge of the Emmys--I would so make that happen for him. (I also wish someone would put me in charge of Congress and the Department of Education. I have some good ideas for them, too.)

(sigh) It's okay DIG writers. I still love you. I'm totally aghast with you (and, I'll be honest, I'm slightly afraid of you), but I'm still head over heels for you. Because I have a hard time getting rid of adverbs; you guys are offing whole characters, left and right! (THIS is what good writing is, you all...they are master storytellers, the DIG writers. Sorry if you're a TV critic and didn't notice that after the first episode--just for that, I hope your bosses make you write about--and, worse, watch--American Idol season XXVVIIIXXIIIVV.)

Okay. That's done. I am done. I'll be okay eventually. Let's move on to DIG #9, Jehoshaphat. (If you haven't read the research I did on Jehoshaphat, you can if you have time--because I think Tad & Co. are heading to the Valley of Jehoshaphat. Or the Dome of the Rock with a bunch of bombs hidden in some books. So go educate yourself on Gog and Magog/Armageddon...Valley of Jehoshaphat is where that starts.)

1-Avram. DIG writers: DO NOT KILL HIM. I forbid it! I forbid it. Avram has a pure, sweet heart. And also: somebody's got to take care of Red the Cow. (On Twitter, Jason told everyone that show creator/writer/producer Gideon Raff bought all the show's cows--so the real Red and her compatriots are somewhere safe now. You will never, ever eat any of them at McDonald's. Which you shouldn't be eating at anyway, since they clean their meat with bleach and are part of the problem not the solution.)

2-Shem the Essene. DIG writers: DO NOT KILL HIM. I forbid it! I forbid it. Shem is bad ass, and I would like him to be in charge (if I can't be). He told Peter that if Peter could solve this mess, he'd heal himself and the world. And who the heck doesn't want to do THAT?! Win-win. And he stopped Avram from making a stupid mistake.

[Edit/Update: I forgot to mention that what the Essenes are doing, as they bury their dead, is saying the Mourner's Kaddish. I wrote about that in one of my geeky researcher entries: HERE...if you're interested in knowing about it.]

3-Lynn. DIG writers: DO NOT KILL HER. I forbid it! I forbid it. She got clocked on the head by that FBI clerk and her accomplice, but I don't think she's dead. I think Lynn is somewhere, just unconscious. Lynn trusted Liat, the FBI girl who is always looking up things on her computer (kind of like me--except I'M trustworthy) (mostly), and asked her to get all the airplane manifestos to find out who Ruth the evil Ambassador had coming into Israel. But hey, Lynn: when the FBI puts beautiful women in your office? That's usually an indication they're double agents. It's what the KGB and the CIA do, too. And probably Scotland Yard. It's how secret agents like to work. I think. At least in show biz.

At any rate--Ruth walked in to Lynn's office, just to mess with Lynn. She knew exactly why Lynn had Liat sitting in her office. She knew. Because Ruth had already put out a hit on Lynn, and Liat was in charge of it. Evil people, I tell ya. You have to stay 2 steps ahead of them.

4-Emma. DIG writers: You can kill Emma. Please kill Emma! (sorry, Alison.) You have my blessing, writers. Kill away. Make it nasty.

Because I knew it! I KNEW IT! That chick is a femme fatale. A Jezebel. The whore of Babylon. (No, for real: the whore of Babylon is in the book of Revelations, as part of the Christian End of Days. She's associated with the Antichrist and the Beast; she's an idolatress who is part of the Apocalypse.) 

5-And Peter! Peter!!! You just HAD to go and have shower sex with the Whore of Babylon, didn't you? Didn't you! And then phone your wife. (Do you ever notice that Peter does this, every time he has sex with someone he's not married to, coworker or idolatress? Peter cheats, then phones home. And he keeps his wedding ring on. Lands. You are a friggin' mess, Peter C.) (and I've given up trying to figure out the chest scar--I think it's just one of those character development things...sometimes when I write stories I give my characters background that never actually makes it in the actual story. Maybe this is one of those things.) (OR! There can be a Season 2 of DIG and the pilot can be titled THE SCAR.)

He talks to his wife about their dead daughter Vicky, seminary, how lost he is. (Seriously, this woman has the patience of a saint.) Peter had a girlfriend in seminary school (red flag #1), and he was just amazed when he held baby Vicky for the first time. Then Peter's wife says, "She came to us for a reason." (That's a clue--I'll tell you what I think his wife meant in just a minute.)

Before calling his saintly wife, Peter does a thing that, when I still believed Jesus is magic and went to church, I used to like to do: plays Bible roulette. It's where you get the Bible (actually, any holy text will do), close your eyes, and shuffle the pages to see where God lands you. Like spiritual Magic 8 Ball (which actually does work, you guys--go find a Magic 8 Ball and try it. Magic 8 Ball knows EVERYTHING, I'm not kidding) (whatever--I see you out there, rolling your eyes at me...a Magic 8 Ball told me I'd move to Georgia. BOOM! Stick that in your skeptic file).

Peter lands on a verse in the book of 1 Peter (of course!) specifically chapter 4, which basically tells him to be on the lookout--Satan's on the prowl. (Here, I will assert that, while not religious, I am spiritual...and so I watch shows like DIG and scenes like this and go: this is where the Divine intervenes to love and protect. Happens all the time--at some point, remind me, and I'll tell you about the time the Divine rescued me from being sold into sex slavery from a Mexican pool hall.)(No, seriously.)

Then Golan comes and makes his annoyed but loving Golan jokes about Peter keeping his peter in his pants.

6-Josh. DIG writers: You can kill Josh. Please kill Josh! (sorry, Zen.) You have my blessing.

Ruth Ridell is a religious crazy. She kisses Josh's hand like he's the King of England or the Pope. (Note to self: start having 2nd graders kiss my hand--establish a classroom hierarchy.) There are ginormous boxes of Tad Billingham's books in the airport warehouse they land at. (How the hell does Tad Billingham get published so easily? I can't get anyone to even read my wattpad.com short story.) Personally, I think the books are hiding explosives...explosives that will be sent to the Temple Mount to blow things up after Red has been burned up. Or maybe Tad just really, really hopes people in Israel will read his book and join his cult. (I'm kidding...the books are a front.)

7-Emma is a femme fatale. She kills Golan. She's a bad guy. Bad girl. A devil's advocate. A Jezebel gone wild. No longer in my tribe--kicked out! 

I loved the camera work--another example of how the creators are playing with lighting, color, scenery, camera angles, etc and so forth to tell their story. Emma's true nature is revealed in Golan's dying pupil......

................................

I'm sorry. I'm back. I had to take sobbing/grief break. (it's okay! I'll be okay--please, no flowers. Just donate to a literacy or childhood poverty program in Golan's name, okay?)

At any rate, Emma's vicious. And probably another religious crazy--she tells Peter as she's wiping up blood that she thinks it's kind of nice when people want to die for their beliefs. (Remember when she said John Donaldson's room at the convent was crazy? Pot, meet kettle.) 

My theory is that she's Peter's daughter's twin. I think Peter and his wife adopted Vicky--or were given Vicky to raise in some way. (Remember? "She came to us for a reason.") And I think Emma MAY be related to Vicky? Maybe. I could be wrong. But I feel strongly I am NOT wrong about Vicky being adopted by Peter and saintly, patient wife. There's just something weird about Emma, and about Peter's daughter. I've heard a theory about cloning--maybe. Maybe Emma/Vicky were cloned in the creepy New Mexico compound. And one was given to Peter/wife and the other to John Donaldson/wife. Because girls can't be high priests. 

(But then, why wouldn't they have just offed those baby girls? But maybe the high priest and the baby girls were supposed to breed the Messiah...I don't know I don't know!! It's hard to know when dealing with religious crazies.)

At any rate, I also wonder if EMMA was the child left alone for 3 days with the bodies of her dead parents (the retired detective tells Golan this at his house in the Negev desert--he asks him to imagine what that would do to a child. Oh, I don't know, retired, grizzly Israeli detective? Turn them into a cold-blooded assassin? Maybe?)

Okay. Some other things to address in Dig #9:

--Margrove. That weasel got Peter to go to the Dig site. He's so wrong. DIG writers, you have my blessing to kill him off, too. (Sorry, Richard.)

--Gregory. He tells Golan everything. But then Golan takes it to the grave (of course). So he's not as crazy as he appears--I think he's being drugged on purpose, to keep him quiet I think. And I'm wondering if--now that Golan undrugged him--Gregory's going to pull it together, escape from the asylum, and come to Peter's rescue.

--Avram unpurifies Red by spray painting her. He also tries to kill Rabbi Lev, but is stopped by Essene Shem. And Shem tells him: that's not who you kill. You kill the High Priest. (Take out the queen...I know someone told me here in the comments that the chess piece was a bishop, but I'm wondering if it's actually the queen. In the pictures I looked up on chess, the piece portrayed in the show actually looks more like a queen piece. And--because I teach 2nd grade and we do insect life cycles and so I just happen to know this--there's a mythology that says if the queen bee dies, the entire colony drops dead. It actually doesn't; they just make themselves a new queen and start over, but I think that's interesting, if the chess piece is a queen.)

And one more thing before I go:

There's a mystic part of Judaism called Kabbalah. It's far too comprehensive for me to research it, but I'd love to learn a lot about it because mysticism is my kind of thing. Madonna the singer likes Kabbalah, but her version of it is watered down and feel good. The real Kabbalah is far more mystical than anything Madonna wants to practice.

In Kabbalah, numbers are uber important. In the show so far, we've seen how the number 19 is important. The numbers 7 and 13 are also big in Kabbalah, and have played into the show but not as prominently as 19. Another big number is 36.

In Kabbalah, there's a thing about something called "Righteous Souls." There are 36 of these souls on our planet (right now! as you read this!), and they don't even know who they are. God has a job for them to complete, and once they complete it, they're good. They go back to their lives none the wiser. In Hebrew, they're called Tzadikim Nistarim "hidden righteous ones"), and if Peter is one of the 36 hidden righteous ones, in Hebrew he'd be a Lamed Vav Tzadikim. The two Hebrew letters for the number 36 are lamed and vav, 30 + 6. The concept is based on a Talmudic statement that every generation has 36 righteous souls, who are there to greet the Divine Presence, or the Shechinah, which means "where God dwells."

Mystical Hasidic Judaism believes these 36 people are there to prove to God why He ought to keep us all around still, why He shouldn't just erase us and start all over. They are there to prevent disasters and the like, and once they prevent these disasters, they just....go back to their regular lives. They don't know each other, they aren't even aware of what they're doing, and they are spread all over the world. And, quite frankly, if someone ever walks up to you and goes, "Hi there...I'm here to save the world because I'm a Lamed Vav Tzadikim," then you'll know you're dealing with a fake. They are humble and sincere about what they're doing. They're just...trying to help. (I do this ALL the time, and usually make things worse. I'm hoping there's another set of 36, numbers 37-72 Lamed Vav Tzadikim, the loose cannon ones.)

More important? They are the WHOLE reason God keeps us all around. As long as there are 36 people who don't know they're saints running around, God's pretty good with us and we're safe. No destructive floods and crap. (Unless you're in Nepal--I hope you've texted some money to them.)

Anyway, that's who I think Peter is--he's a righteous soul who doesn't know it. But I bet Shem the Essene has his suspicions, which would be why he told Peter to fix this effed up Tad Billingham/Rabbi Lev situation, and he'd heal himself. Peter can go back to his saintly, patient wife and they can pick up the pieces.

Maybe.

Because NO!! No, USA Network!! You need to send Peter on another mission. He's one of the planet's 36 Righteous Souls, here to save us all!! And there's a girl in Atlanta, Georgia who needs stuff to research and write about. Okay? The planet's a humongous mess; there's plenty of healing for Peter to do for this crazy rock of ours. SEASONS of material. And more darlings for the DIG writers to kill off. 

I don't know if my heart can take it though--I'm the walking wounded here, in Georgia, about Golan. Just as I finished moving through the 7 stages of grief with Debbie, BAM. Now I'm back at square one. 

Story of my life: And then she was back at square one.

jumping jehoshaphat

Dearest Internet, 

Can we chat for a minute? I have to tell you: I really keep meaning to post a ridiculously long and very very thorough research article here about Temple Mount, because I feel like it's sort of the center piece to the show DIG. But the more I talk to people, and the more I read, the sadder I get. Humanity, for real?! Over a rock. Honestly. 

No, no! I get it, I get it...it's just. Listen: I'm a Christian in culture only, as I do not believe Jesus is Magic, and I have become a godless heathen who hasn't graced the inside of a holy building for nigh going on 3 years now and the last time was for a Christmas Eve service and I only went because my mom was buying dinner. (Hi, Mom! I love you! I promise how I've turned out is ME and not you.) 

I get it--I am surely hell bound for not taking God seriously--I'm certain the Universe has directed me to the story of Jehoshaphat as Its first warning shot. But then I think about my sister-in-law's sweet Baptist Grandmama who always said to you, whenever you were worried or really really angry about something, "Now look at y'all get y'all self riled. A hundred years from now, is this still going to matter?" 

And the answer is no. NO it won't matter. And this is why I think the Temple Mount stuff...gah, wait! That argument won't work, I just realized, people have been fighting over the Temple Mount for MILLENIA...so Grandmama's wisdom is futile here. Poop. Ok. Well, then...let's move on, shall we?

I will post what I learned about it, soon. Possibly this weekend. But I want every single one of you reading this to know I feel nervous about doing it. Because I've seen some things and I've read some things and I don't want anybody coming in here, to a comments section, to insist: Oh, that belongs to US not THEM. and start Armageddon in this blog. I read the Internet--I know how you people are. I see you on FOX Nation and in Yahoo! News Articles and in the Education section of Huffingtonpost.com. I won't have it here, I won't have it--I'm the peace and love and tolerance and connections girl...nooobody's allowed to be angry here. When I start talking about Dome of the Rock/Temple Mount. I mean it.

Sincerely,

Amy 

(who thinks John Lennon's IMAGINE should be taught as gospel in public schools and universities)

So instead, let's talk about Jehoshaphat today, shall we? And I apologize if I misspell or typo his name throughout this piece--typing it, for me, is like trying to type out Missississsssiiiissspppippi 100 times real fast.

But first: A Game of Chess.

But! Before we talk about HIM, let's talk about the game of chess briefly. 'Cause I looked it up. And I looked it up because Gregory Donaldson, in episode 8, was given a Bishop chess piece (I was told) in the mail. And Emma was casually fingering that same piece in dad Donaldson's Room of Freaking Psycho. 

I don't play chess, but here's what Wikipedia told me to do with the Bishop: each player gets two Bishops. To start, one Bishop is placed between the King and his knight, and the other is placed between the Queen and her knight. There are no restrictions on how a Bishop can move in chess (whereas some pieces can only move forward or diagonal), but it's not allowed to jump over the others (but Knights can). 

The interesting thing about the Bishop piece (when I think of DIG) is that when you begin, you decide which wing each Bishop will play on...you decide at the beginning which of your Bishops will stay on either all the light-colored squares...and which Bishop will stay on the dark-colored squares (Sons of Light...Sons of Dark--right?). 

In Medieval chess, there was no Bishop. There was the alfil, meaning elephant, and it could jump and move diagonal and move 2 squares. Because it had such movement, it got restricted to 8 squares only and alfils couldn't attack each other. The Bishop came along around 1200, just as The Crusades were ending, but it wasn't officially called a "Bishop" until about the 1600s. What I'm trying to tell you is chess is an old game. An old, very old, game. 

And it's a game of strategy, of outwitting your opponent. Less experienced players tend to underestimate the power of a Bishop; more experienced players do not. As the game nears an end, and more pieces are captured and more lines on which they can play open up, a Bishop becomes more and more powerful, when used correctly. For example, two bishops together are far more superior to one bishop, a knight, or a pair of knights. And two Bishops vs. a King forces a checkmate, and when checkmate happens? Game. OVER. 

So. Gregory was sent a Bishop piece. Where's the other piece? Who has it? And are they saying to Gregory: time to wake up out of your muted psychosis? The endgame is near? 

(I'm still thinking about that. You go think about it too if you'd like...and also: if you play chess, will you come to my house and teach me? Because now that I've learned more about it, I think people who are good at that game are kind of hot, and I'd so I'd like to hang out with you. I promise you'll beat me, because I'm a horrible--HORRIBLE--strategizer.)

Onward to Valley of Jehoshaphat:

Source: bibleencyclopedia.com

Jehoshaphat means "God judges." It's from the same Hebrew root word as the name of the 7th book of the Old Testament, Judges (Shophatim). He was the 4th king of the Kingdom of Judah, and his reign was considered one of the most prosperous in its history. (At one point, Israel was divided into two kingdoms: Judah to the south, Israel to the north.) It became prosperous when it allied itself with Assyria, which wanted to control the olive industry. Eventually, around 605 BCE, Egypt and Neo-Babylon fought for control of it, and it fell and became part of the Neo-Babylonian Empire.

The other thing about Judah is that it was always at war with its neighbors Israel and Egypt. Jehoshaphat's father, King Asa of Judah, reigned for 35 years in peace, until in his 36th year Baasha of Israel confronted Asa creating a dangerous situation. So Asa took gold and treasure from the Temple Mount and sent them to the king of Damascus to convince them to end their peace treaty with Israel. Damascus attacked Israel, and Baasha was defeated. Asa used this to fortify his own borders.

Jehoshaphat, like his father Asa, was very pious in that he hated idolatry. He had a friendly, BIG personality, and so his people immensely liked and trusted him. Which is why, in the 3rd year of his reign, he sent out priests from the tribe of Levi to teach the people of Judah the Torah, and about morality, and to show them how to worship the one true God properly. In the Bible, Jehoshaphat is praised because of this, and God blesses his reign and his kingdom.

Jehoshaphat also reorganized Judah--he divided it into districts and rearranged the judicial system so it aligned with what the Torah commanded. He built a large, well-organized army and fortified his borders. By doing this, he earned the respect and admiration of neighboring countries. The Edomites, Arabs, Philistines, and others came to Jehoshaphat to pay him tributes to keep his goodwill. 

One day, Jehoshaphat took a royal trip to Samaria and agreed to help Ahab, the King of Israel, fight the king of Syria. Ahab and Jehoshaphat were allied via the marriage of Jehoshaphat's son Joram to Ahab's daughter. But at the end of the fight, Ahab was killed and Israel defeated. 

Jehoshaphat was allowed to return to Judah but when he got back, all his prophets were so annoyed and they all yelled at him. So then, Jehoshaphat was basically like, "Yeah, I know you guys, my bad." And he promised to do better.

But then, one day? Jehoshaphat (trying to increase his kingdom's wealth) started trading with people along the Mediterranean Sea. Ahab's son Ahaziah was King of Israel now, and Jehoshaphat went into the maritime business with him. Bad financial move, because God was watching and got pretty ticked about that, since Ahaziah was NOT very moral and didn't do worship right, and so God sent a big storm and destroyed Jehoshaphat's entire fleet of ships.

At that, Jehoshaphat was all "Okay, okay. I GET it, God." And when Ahaziah came and said, "Hey, Jehoshaphat, want to re-new our partnership?" Jehoshaphat was like, "Nope. Take thy idolatrous self back to Israel, Ahaziah."

Still Jehoshaphat was friendly (remember?) and so he stayed in touch with Ahaziah--sent him little messages via pigeon or donkey or whatever once in awhile, checking in (like ancient Facebook status updates, texts, emails). So later, when he asked for Jehoshaphat's help in fighting the Moabites, Jehoshaphat said: Sure. And used his Edomite connections and also asked the Prophet Elisha to guide him. Elisha, because Jehoshaphat came to him humble and regular people, let him know: "Oh, yeah, you're good; you got this." And then? God smote Moab. As God is wont to do (in these stories).

Later, however, the Moabites were able to get the Edomites all worked up against the Kingdom of Judah. So THEN, the Moabites, Edomites, and Ammonites went after the Kingdom of Judah. Jehoshaphat's army was weak and depleted from the other Moab thing, so he just asked his people to go on a fast and pray--pray hard. 

During the fast, Jehoshaphat himself offered prayers to God for help, and God answered them. A prophet said there would be complete victory, because the battle wasn't theirs, but God's. So Jehoshaphat's army, getting a second wind, marched on Jerusalem to see what was what. When it got there, everything was over. Corpses all around. Stick a fork in it. Because it turned out the Moabites and Edomites and Ammonites didn't actually trust each other, in fact, hated each other...so they they did what neighboring gangs in busted down neighborhoods usually do: drive bys and shoot outs, and you know. Just basically killed each other until they were all dead. (I have very Tea Party Conservative friends who feel this is a smart idea for most situations. Which is why I'm pro-gun control.)

Jehoshaphat collected all the spoils of war, without having really to lift a finger, and the Kingdom of Judah prospered in peace until he died at age sixty and his son Joram became King. (Reggae-themed fairy tale ending music inserted HERE--you'll find out why in a minute.)

The Valley of Jehoshaphat, connecting Kidron Valley to the Valley of Hinnom, which is a valley of graves

In Israel, today, there is an area known as the Valley of Jehoshaphat. It's also the area known as Kidron Valley, and it's an ancient burial ground.

The Valley of Jehoshaphat is located in the Old City of Jerusalem, on the Eastern side, right near the Temple Mount. The part that is Kidron Valley actually separates Temple Mount from the Mount of Olives. (In case you don't know: Temple Mount is sacred to both Jews and Muslims; it's Judaism's holiest site--where the original Temple stood/Abraham almost killed Isaac...and it's Islam's 3rd holiest site--where the Prophet Mohammad ascended into Heaven on a white horse. The Mount of Olives is sacred to Christians--this is the spot Jesus supposedly ascended into Heaven after rising from the dead.) It is filled with flat, rocky tombs, and it was one of the main burial grounds during the 2nd Temple period. This area stretches for about 20 miles through the Judean Desert toward the Dead Sea.

The Hebrew Bible calls it Emek Yehoshafat, and in Jewish prophecies, it's the location the Prophet Elijah will come when he returns...followed by the Messiah...followed by the War of Gog and Magog, aka Judgment Day, aka Armageddon. (Basically if Disneyland is the Happiest Place on Earth, the Valley of Jehoshaphat is like the antidote.)

In the Book of Joel 3:11-12, the prophet Joel talked about it:

Assemble yourselves, and come, all ye heathen, and gather yourselves together round about: thither cause thy mighty ones to come down, O LORD. Let the heathen be wakened, and come up to the valley of Jehoshaphat: for there will I sit to judge all the heathen round about.

Modern day people like to talk about Jehoshaphat still, by using his name in silly ways: "jumping Jehoshaphat," for example. 

In Isaac Asimov's ROBOT series, it's often used as an expletive. 

And Jehoshaphat is the subject of a reggae song by Max Romeo called "Valley of Jehoshaphat." (While not even HALF as awesome or summery as Bob Marley's STIR IT UP or THREE LITTLE BIRDS, Max does sing a really very interesting song that mentions the color red a lot, garments dipped in blood, Robin Hood, and something about two being in bed and one being taken away, and money being spread all over the land...GO HERE and listen.)

DIG (on USA) thoughts: ep 8 (kill your darling)

Alas, poor Debbie. We knew her well.

[Edit/Update: WAIT!!! I totally forgot about the CHESS PIECE. The one that Gregory Donaldson got at the asylum in the mail and Emma was fingering in Gregory's dad's room at the convent. I think it has a meaning. But I have to, you know, research it. Since I don't play chess and couldn't tell you a thing about it--like which piece was that? Bet that's important. Or maybe they were just saying: Your move, Gregory. Or Checkmate. I'll look into it. But if you know what piece that was--will you leave a comment for me at the bottom?]

The best laid plans of mice and men....this is what torture feels like:

So on Thursday, half-way through episode 8 of DIG, my phone rings. It's my husband, coming back from a business trip, and he's at a MARTA (Atlanta's weak attempt at public transportation) station in sitting in a dead car with a dead car battery. 

And HERE'S why good parenting matters: for about 1 minute, I struggled with what to do. I mean, DIG is on. SOMETHING'S about to HAPPEN. Peter and Emma were in the creepy room about to discover something. Certainly my spouse could wait 30 minutes for me to find out, and then 30 more minutes for me to drive there. He'd been traveling all day--what was 1 more hour? 

But no. I was raised to be dependable and responsible and keep things in perspective and do unto others as I... So. Whispering many many swears and dirty oaths, I switched off the TV, woke my child, and we drove to Brookhaven to get him...the whole time I'm listening to live tweets about the show going off, on my phone. Torture. Worse than water boarding. 

Because when I got back, I saw somebody important had died. I immediately stopped reading all the tweets and told my people--NOBODY TELL ME!!! And then the next day I stayed off the Internet, at least the portions of the Internet that could have DIG-related information. I couldn't even go support Jason Isaacs, who went to Washington, DC to argue with Congress about giving more money to Arts education programs for children. That was three (THREE) things I heart a lot: kids, art, and education (okay, 4 if you count arguing with politicians)...and I couldn't even go look to see how it was going. In case he or somebody tweeting on his page said something. NOBODY TELL ME!!!

Later, Ori Pfeffer (Golan Cohen) saw where I'd tweeted before my torture began that I hoped they didn't kill him off, and he let me know it wasn't him. And that was JUST like teaching 2nd graders, because that was totally not even following directions, Ori! I said NOT A WORD.

At any rate, about 9.30 PM on Friday I got to watch it finally. And so here are my thoughts:

1-I think the most important thing about show #8 is to say how upset I am with the writers, yet in complete, gobsmacked awe of them. I'm just now able to look in their general direction again after they killed off Debbie. DEBBIE!!! Listen, I was attached to Debbie, DIG writers. I felt a spiritual connection to her--Debbie was a complete fuck up just trying to get it right, and she had a pure heart. If she wore patchouli, wrote bad poetry, and drank wine, she and I could have totally hung out and been BFFs. 

And NOW there can't even be a "Don't EFF With Debbie" DIG spin off. Crap. I'm still in mourning. 

And yet, THIS is a fine example of what good writing is--you kill your darlings. Because the story demands it, and it's going to evoke such a powerful emotional reaction in your audience they won't even know what to do with themselves, and even years later will tell people, when they speak of it, when they remember your story: THEY KILLED DEBBIE. And how dare they!

Which is all to say: I'm so in love with the DIG writers right now I can't even see straight. I'm so mad about Debbie, yet I'm so completely head over heels with them for making that bold choice. This is like one of those completely dysfunctional romantic relationships--no matter how many darlings they kill off, I'll always answer the 1 AM booty call and tell them to come over, without even a second thought. (If their car dies at 10.30 PM in the middle of an episode of DIG though, I'd spend about a minute mulling it over.)

2A-So Debbie died. At that stinkin' little twerp Josh's hands. See! I knew it, I KNEW it! Life Tip: Don't trust ANY genetically-engineered creepy little kids, Internet. This scene was NOT my favorite (for obvious reasons) ... but it was amazing writing. So much was going on in the scene--this is how you get audiences to connect with Story...we'd been given just enough character-building background on Debbie to care and want her to win. She'd been through SO much, had lost so much. There was more spunk to her than first met the eye. And so there she was, after a really nasty, brave fight with real Evil. And now it's quiet, she's got her boy, and she's finally starting to feel like there's some hope. Meanwhile, Josh is in the backseat pulling out...a knife. 

Oh my god. I think I need to have a memorial service or something just to emotionally move on.

When I re-watched, knowing what was coming, the scene where Debbie leaves a message for her mom on the phone? Wrought tears from me. THAT was my favorite scene from this show. 

2B-Also, Debbie discovers the genetic engineering--ultrasounds in files of women at the compound. Fay was one--she bore a Josh. Which basically means she may have killed her own kid. The other lady from the compound, Sandra, her body was used. Basically, the women were vessels for birthing the High Priest. (How many Joshes ARE there??) I think this current Josh is Josh #3. I thought he was still #2, but it was pointed out to me that #2 died in the car chase when Charlie was shot. No matter. (A) I can't count, and neither could Debbie, and (B) HOW MANY JOSHES ARE THERE?? 

I think just 3. Let's hope, for the sake of our planet, just three.

3-Peter and Emma (and Margrove and assistant) (Debbie has to die, but that pissant little MARGROVE is still running around! Life = Unfair) go to the Sisters of Dinah convent to look for treasures--Margrove to look for gold and riches; Peter and Emma to find a way to save the planet. 

But listen: I did 3 hours of research on Dinah and her story because I thought there would be a Dinah was raped connection...20 websites, 3 hours, 2 for writing. And Dinah wasn't in the story (periphery, maybe)...but oh, ha! I get it: Sisters of Dinah...SISTERS...nuns. Of course. In episode 1 or 2 (I think) Peter walks through a bunch of nuns--foreshadowing! (PAY ATTENTION.) 

At any rate. This convent is where John Donaldson made the crazy VHS tape. It's also where the Temple Mount treasures are buried...or it leads to them. Symbols are all over the place in it...Aramaic, Coptic, Canaanite. It's an ancient place. (Why does Peter never seem to use his semiotics background knowledge? Hm.)

The 2 most important things about this episode are: 

(1) What crazy John Donaldson wrote on the walls. What I picked up was: WHO'S ORDERING THE ORDER? (and then some stuff about The Apocalypse.) So I asked @DIGonUSA...Who's ordering the Order? (Because you know who this is, right? Somebody's giving orders to the Order of Moriah. Figure out who that is, and you'll know which bad guys to go nab so the planet doesn't blow up.)

and 

(2) The Temple Mount treasures. Always follow the money (I do this, whenever I talk about public education reform--want to know why something psycho's happening? Follow the money.)

I don't know who's doing the orders yet. I suspect Ruth Ridell is involved--not her, per se, giving the orders. But she's the go-between for somebody who is. 

4-Ruth puts out a hit on Lynn. Because Lynn IS trustworthy, yay! And Lynn is asking a lot of questions. Like going to the weasel-y little camera security guy and getting proof the cameras were down the night Khalid went to the Ambassador's party. That camera guy totally ratted out Lynn, after she asked him NOT to. (Follow. Directions.)

5-Lynn retraced Khalid's steps with the camera information. What I would like to say about this is to offer a Public Service Announcement: Do NOT climb tall chain link fence gates. Lynne did this in high heels. Once, I did this in flip flops. Things worked out for Lynn, but I broke my left foot's fifth metatarsal, almost in the Jones fracture area. 

That's all I could think, as she climbed the gate: Lynn, girlfriend, you are NOT dressed for that. 

6-Emma's Agent Wilson now. Because she's a quick on her feet thinker and came up with that lie when Zohar asked who she was...OR she has a big reason she doesn't want Professor Isaac Zohar to know she's an archaeologist who knew Margrove. Hmm. I still don't trust her for some reason. I'm going to go with 70% trust, 40% wariness. Maybe 80/30...I have to cover myself in case I'm wrong.

7-The Essene IS a good guy! In a sort of religious guy mafioso kind of way. Listen--everything they're doing with the Essenes is all researched-based. Those guys were serious. They were peaceful and vegan, but they were protectors/guarders/keepers of secrets. And they were prepared to do battle in the Sons of Light v. Sons of Darkness epic battle. 

I don't think they were going to hurt sweet little Red the cow. I didn't see any knives out then...it may have been some sort of dedication ceremony of sorts. Essenes just didn't kill animals. They only used the skins of animals that had died naturally. I'm not sure what they were doing with the cow, but I'm 99% certain it wasn't a sacrifice (the 1% is to cover my ass in case I'm wrong). And I'm 99% certain because Shem the Essene tells Peter to be careful as he's shooting or he'll hit the cow.

8-So now Rabbi Lev's goons have the cow again. Ain't that how it always goes? You make your plans, your plans seem to be falling into place, and KABLOOEY. Somebody's car dies, somebody steals back your cow. Life's crazy like that.

9-Poor Avram. He's a bad guy who doesn't know it. And Rabbi Lev is probably going to punish him for his fuck up...he was supposed to kill the Essene. Had Avram killed Shem, none of this would have happened. But now Avram has to go back to the Yeshiva, which is a Jewish private school that studies all the religious texts. Basically, Rabbi Lev called Avram a pansy little school boy. (I hate Rabbi Lev, and I hope God smites him at the end. And I hope Ruth and Tad Billingham are smited too. And Josh! Oh my god, DIG writers, please smite Josh!)

10-This is what DIG (on USA!) does to you--has you wishing, out loud and in public, for the death of a kid. But in my defense, he's not a REAL kid. Plus, he killed Debbie. For that, he must die.

Did you know that, on YouTube, you can go and watch episodes of showrunners Gideon Raff and Tim Kring talking about each episode, after it airs? I did not KNOW this!! Crap! I've been operating as a complete loose cannon, a rogue out in the field, lacking critical classified information. I don't know why I wasn't aware of these, but now I've watched them all and understand even more. You can too, if you want.

Or! You can go read about how I tried to pull a Lynn and broke my left foot about 3 years ago: My Left Foot.